5 things that we should say NO to in the Desi Culture
1)Complexion
In this era of black lives matter, the complexion is not just
something desi but rather a sickening
concept ingrained in the minds of people belonging to different ethnicities. The
idea behind this problem is that fairness
is directly proportional to beauty, now this has to change. Often people with a
dark complexion have such great features that cannot even be compared to the
features that a fair person might have. We
are all God’s creations so have at least this much faith that he will never
make any of his creations ugly. Each feature that you have goes perfectly
with your complexion. And there should be no doubt about that. Now we come to
those people who think they have the right to comment on the way God created
you. The right to make someone feel bad about something that was never in their
hands, speaks a lot about what kind of people they are themselves. The way they
are questioning God tells us that they themselves are also insecure about how
they look and feel that they should make others feel the same. One should never
be bothered by such kind of people rather pity them since they are burning in a
self-ignited fire every day. What should truly matter to you is how you think
of yourself and how much of a beautiful soul you have as beauty will always
fade over time but what will always stay with you like a shadow, will be your
personality and character.
2)Men cannot cry
For one second even if we agree on this then we should agree
also on the fact that neither they can cry nor they can make others cry. To
just talk about how society expects men to be emotionally strong and to
have a complete grip on the emotions they have is inhuman. Men are living
beings and they deserve the right to break down when things get harder and
crying is never a sign of weakness it is an emotion that humans should have, it
helps to get rid of the negativity that surrounds an individual and according
to a study, people who cry less have greater negative thoughts compared to
those who cry. Crying helps to reduce stress, it actually removes toxins from the body. Tears help humans
eliminate stress hormones like cortisol that build up during times of emotional
turmoil and can wreak havoc on the body. Crying is both a physical and
emotional release that helps humans start over with a blank slate. You
can disagree with me but not science. In our society where men are told to hold
back to all their frustrations and to have lesser ability to feel and have
empathy that’s why there are increasing cases of domestic violence as that frustration has to come out one way or another. If given equal right to feel and
express their emotions then both the genders will not only value each other more
but also understand as often emotions are stronger than words.
3)Having the right to change a career-oriented woman into a
housewife
Now here we are not debating on who is better and who is not
as it solely depends on an individual as to how they want to go about in their
lives and both types of women have massive impacts to make in their lifetime. But
what we are talking about here is that there shouldn’t be any form of
compulsion as to enforcing a girl to suddenly leave all her dreams, one random day
when a marriage proposal comes where the family doesn’t approve of the women
doing a job. Now every family has all the right to decide what they are looking
for and there is no problem in anyone being career-oriented or a housewife but
the problem only arises when someone is told to forget all their dreams. Now to
give you an example, millions of woman who become doctors don’t practice in
hospitals after marriage which clearly is not just a loss of that woman but a
loss of all that insane amount of money
that just got drained into nothing while receiving the MBBS degree. It is a loss of a country too when there
are less doctors available who have used the resources of the country by
completing the qualification but were held back from serving the country. This has been so prevalent that an organization named docthers was formed to ensure that the underutilized capacity of female doctors are met in the health sector of Pakistan.
4) Mental health to be considered as a taboo
If one visits a psychiatrist then they have lost it all and
are labeled as insane minds. It is very important to realize that mental health
is as important as physical health and if not equal then more. It will not
matter much even if your body is physically functioning fine if the thing that
controls it is all is stressed out. Let us agree to talk about it when it gets hard
to hold on to as we surely don’t want people around us to commit suicide to make us realize they needed us.
5) Daughters are considered as liability whereas the son is
the interest
Now this should surely change after all it is the 21st
century. If we give girls equal importance as boys, we ultimately build a
better world with harmony as in order to change the world, it all starts with
the change in your family unit. If quality education is given to both the
genders along with importance there is no way a daughter won’t contribute to
the household as much as a son. I hope one day people are as happy to know that
it is a girl as when they are when it is a boy. Let us agree that sons are cates
while daughters are blessings.
There are more than 5 such issues to talk about and the list
goes on but till then I hope that at least we are able to change a few such
things. Talk in your households and have discussions with people who might have
similar views that need to be changed. I know the hardest thing to do in life
is to change someone’s mindset but at
least one can try. Trying to change it will mean you don’t approve of this
culture.
